Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.
(Mark Twain, 1835 – 1910)
John Lentell
14th March, 1971
Monday’s Piece
Month: May 2016
Sunday’s Piece
“Dear John Lentell –
We are holding for ransom one irreplaceable imported (smuggled?) article. Do not contact either the C.I.D. or the local Fuzz. Your article will be returned to you unbroken if you comply with this stipulation. Place the following piece in the Rhodesia Herald –
‘For the cup of sun I stole
From the shelf beside the roll
I apologise most abjectly.’
All transactions will be carried out over a bottle of Manica. This is your one and only ultimatum – comply with it or your article will be brushed out. Peace.”
(Anonymous letter received – unstamped – 5c postage dud)
John Lentell
13th March, 1971
Saturday’s Piece
I’m sending mine to Filippa’s.
John Lentell
12th March, 1971
Friday’s Piece
“NEW laws could force you to kennel your bitch…”
(Advertisement in yesterday’s Personal Column)
John Lentell
11th March, 1971
Thursday’s Piece
“I wish you could make the kind of bread my mother used to make.”
“Well, dear, I wish you could make the kind of dough my father used to make.”
John Lentell
10th March, 1971
Wednesday’s Piece
I never could understand how a person speaking only English thought it funny to hear broken english spoken by a foreigner who could speak 10 other languages too.
(Gracie Allen, 1895 – 1964)
John Lentell
9th March, 1971
Tuesday’s Piece
There is not a more mean, stupid, dastardly, pitiless, selfish, spiteful, envious, ungrateful animal than the public.
(William Hazlitt, 1788 – 1830, The First Modern Man)
John Lentell
8th March, 1971
