“La mejor salsa del mundo es el hambre.”
(The best sauce in the world is hunger.)
(Miguel de Cervantes, 1547 – 1616)
John Lentell
October 28th, 1968
Saturday’s Piece
“What shall we do – or go fishing?”
(From Body, boots, & britches: folktales, ballads, and speech from country New York by Harold Thompson)
John Lentell
October 27th, 1968
Friday’s Piece
“Love thy country, wish it well,
Not with too intense a care,
‘Tis enough, that when it fell,
Thou its ruin didst not share.”
(George Bubb Dodington, 1st Baron Melcombe, 1691 – 1762)
John Lentell
October 26th, 1968
Thursday’s Piece
“In your longing for your giant self lies your goodness; and that longing is in all of you.”
(The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran, 1883 – 1931)
John Lentell
October 25th, 1968
Wednesday’s Piece
Chief Justice Warren, when Governor of California began a political address thus: “Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m pleased to see this dense crowd here tonight.” A voice from the back shouted, “Don’t be too pleased. We ain’t all dense!”
John Lentell
October 24th, 1968
Tuesday’s Piece
“I don’t know, Ma’am, why they make all this fuss about education; none of the Pagets can read or write, and they get on well enough.”
(William Lamb, 2nd Viscount Melbourne, 1779 – 1848 – to Queen Victoria)
John Lentell
October 23rd, 1968
Monday’s Piece
“Ross, if you don’t lend me your Orlando book you are a bad Samaritan.”
(Dickon Lentell – age 5 – to his brother!)
John Lentell
October 22nd, 1968
Sunday’s Piece
I have a London-tailored, double-breasted, dark grey, narrow pin-striped, fairly up-to-date cut, winter weight suit. It cost the earth and I never wear it. Winter is upon Europe and should the next round of ‘talks’ be held there, or in a climate as chilly, I would willingly loan my suit to a size 40 Rhodesian delegate. If the journey is successful I would be delighted and, understandably, not a little proud of this ‘old friend’ who came into my life with good intentions but who has lead such an uneventful existence so far. Nothing up the sleeve – I swear.
John Lentell
October 21st, 1968
Saturday’s Piece
“Hubert Brinton told me he took it down in a notebook at the time how a verger was escorting a party round Westminster Abbey, when one of the party knelt down and prayed: “Come along, sir,” commanded the verger – “But mayn’t I have a few moments of private devotion?” – “No, we can’t ‘ave that, or we should soon ‘ave people prayin’ all over the place.”
(An Innkeeper’s Diary by John Rowland Fothergill, 1876 – 1957)
John Lentell
October 20th, 1968
Friday’s Piece
“Pathological exhibits…human scum…paranoiacs, degenerates, morons, bludgers…pack of dingos…industrial outlaws and political lepers…ratbags. If these people went to Russia, Stalin wouldn’t even use them for manure.”
(Arthur Caldwell, 1896 – 1973, Australian Minister of Immigration, on Australian communists in a speech.)
Our land is a soft land! – John Lentell
October 19th, 1968
Thursday’s Piece
“The extreme penalty for bigamy?
Two mothers-in-law.”
(Lord Chief Justice Russell, 1832 – 1900)
John Lentell
October 18th, 1968
Wednesday’s Piece (2)
“A local doctor’s bill now bears a sticker reading, ‘Long time no fee’.”
(From ‘Shake Well Before Using’ by Bennett Cerf, 1898 – 1971).
John Lentell
October 17th, 1968
Wednesday’s Piece (1)
(Originally submitted but rejected by Rhodesia Herald censors):
“At the RBC you either resign or remain in a state or resignation. (With apologies to Collie Knox)”
(The RBC was the state controlled Rhodesian Broadcasting Corporation, now succeeded by the state controlled Zimbabwe Broadcasting Corporation)
John Lentell
October 17th, 1968
Tuesday’s Piece
“Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts compromise.
Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact
To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act.”
(Taken from Rudyard Kipling‘s poem “The Female of the Species“, 1865 – 1936)
John Lentell
October 16th, 1968
Monday’s Piece
“Good Mr. Fortune, A.R.A.,
Rejoiced in twenty sons,
But even there he failed, they say,
To get a likeness once.”
(G.R. Hamilton, from Lucillus)
John Lentell
October 15th, 1968
Sunday’s Piece
“The Art Gallery, which belongs to Bournemouth, is the most extraordinary shrine of absolute bad taste that exists in the whole of Great Britain. It should certainly be preserved intact.”
(Geoffrey Grigson broadcasting on the Russell-Cotes Art Gallery & Museum, 1905 – 1985)
John Lentell
October 14th, 1968
Saturday’s Piece
“Mr. Gammons: “Do you realise that more gin might help the people of London to forget the labour Government?”
Minister of Food: “Much more gin would be necessary to make them forget the previous government.””
(Hansard)
John Lentell
October 13th, 1968
Friday’s Piece
“You must not miss Whitehall. At one end you will find a statue of one of our kings who was beheaded; at the other the monument of the man who did it. This is just an example of our attempts to be fair to everybody.”
(Sir Edward Appleton at a Stockholm luncheon, 1892 – 1965)
John Lentell
October 12th, 1968
Thursday’s Piece
If on November 11th we are, by chance, asked our opinions of the new flag – what alternative shall we have but to say that it is ‘up the pole’!
John Lentell
October 11th, 1968
(11th November was Rhodesian Independence Day to commemorate UDI, the Unilateral Declaration of Independence from the UK)
Wednesday’s Piece
I am told that our views are (flag) poles apart but by Mrs. Gadd, Sir, I do like her letters. (See Monday’s Rhodesia Herald – “perSmitive” society – the cattle are lewing – and all that!).
John Lentell
October 10th, 1968
PRINCIPLE VIOLATED ON NEW FLAG QUESTION
If Mr. Lardner.Burke is so sure that 99.9 per cent of the population will respect the new flag, why did he not put it to a referendum and remove all doubt? Or is it just possible that there is some substance to the rumour emanating from sources high in Government that orders were placed for this flag in readiness for November 11, even before the legislation had been drawn up?
It is easy to say no better suggestions were forthcoming – like suggestions on a new constitution – when the powers that be have already made up their minds that their own ideas shall prevail. While it was certainly the responsibility of civil servants to go into the matter of suitable designs for national approval, the right of choice was not theirs or that of a handful of Members, but the choice of those they serve.
Certainly we will respect the new flag – we haven’t much choice. Who would wish to pay fines or sit in solitary? But I would advise Mr John Newington, MP for Hillcrest, that scathing comments on members of the public at least his equal in intelligence, are not likely to enhance his image. Come the next elections and it is just possible that some voters will show him how ‘unctuous and sanctimonious’ they can be.
Quite apart from any personal feelings in the matter, I believe that on the question of the new flag a principle has been violated. Governments are elected to govern, but a distinction must be drawn between a dictatorial authority and government by popular consent and no intelligent electorate, valuing its rights and freedoms, would ever let any government forget it.
Certainly we will respect the new flag – we haven’t much choice. Who would wish to pay fines or sit in solitary? But I would advise Mr John Newington, MP for Hillcrest, that scathing comments on members of the public at least his equal in intelligence, are not likely to enhance his image. Come the next elections and it is just possible that some voters will show him how ‘unctuous and sanctimonious’ they can be.Quite apart from any personal feelings in the matter, I believe that on the question of the new flag a principle has been violated. Governments are elected to govern, but a distinction must be drawn between a dictatorial authority and government by popular consent and no intelligent electorate, valuing its rights and freedoms, would ever let any government forget it.
If the majority are now prepared to abrogate their rights and submit to what is now in essence a perSmithive authority, they must not complain when they find themselves in the position of Mr Ian Smith’s cattle who do not embarrass him by asking questions or expecting any answers. They will have brought it on themselves.
(Mrs.) B.C. GADD
Rhodesia Herald – letters page
Monday, 7th October, 1968
Lentell Soup 